My mind is mush. I want to type something to translate to you how amazing the YWAM Awaken DTS has been, but every time I sit to blog about it… my mind scribbles and my heart explodes and they leave me with little words. So I will list out highlights in hope that you see the slightest change in the person I once was, and the person I am becoming…
1. I’ve learned God is the following: king, father, lord, beautiful, lover, creator, friend, provider, glorious, powerful, light, and so so so so so good. These have been said to me as a child, as a teen, as an adult… but they were just words that had no meaning. I now see, hear, feel, and talk to Him (weird, I know.) Now I see the face of Jesus and the color of the Holy Spirit that show me the character of God. Jesus is not just words that have no meaning, but He is teaching me to walk in a way that brings His kingdom here on Earth.
2. Great friends exist. This is the first time in my life that I have been in a bubble of Jesus weirdos… Literally. We are on an island. In the middle of no where. Living with people from all over the world, has shown me that true friendship exists. All I had to do was take my head out of my butt and just LOVE. Love unconditionally, love even when they use my tooth paste without asking, love even when our theology doesn’t agree, love even when they don’t love me back, love even when they aren’t lovable. Why? Because God loves them. Jesus died for them. They were wonderfully, perfectly made, and deserve true love here in this short life.
3. I am so loved and supported. Thank you to all who have supported me in prayer and finances! $7,000 raised, I am so blessed by you. The past 22 years I’ve struggled with my own identity. I’ve felt unloved and unsupported. Part of the DTS teaches us the keys of discipleship:
- God loves us
- We love God
- We love ourselves
- We love others
We can’t do 2 without 1, or 4 without 3. How can I love others if I don’t know my own value? I’ve found it, with the help of many of you who have spoke life into me, and just simply cared. It means the world… I can now love the nations wholeheartedly. A large role in this has been forgiveness and removing expectations. I had the selfish mindset of, “if they don’t support me or reach out, then they don’t care about me.” When in reality, people have lives, kids, and jobs, and they care about me as a person, they just don’t have time to show it. So, please excuse me as I continue to pull my head out of my butt.
I can honestly say that the past few months have been the most stressful, rewarding, stretching, growing, loving, important season of my life. I am so overwhelmed with how much light is bottled up in side of me waiting to reach the darkness of the nations! Unfortunately, I am currently in a grey area. Either my journey continues on in the nation of Argentina, or I am packing my bags and heading home…
My heart and soul screams for the nations. God called me into being a missionary to work in orphanages and to see an end to sex trafficking, and I answered the call. Here I am, with my plane tickets already purchased to Argentina, and all supplies have been provided… I know God did not bring me all this way to go home in two and a half weeks because of money.
So I ask, I humbly ask you, family/ friends/ reader, to join me in prayer. Pray that my mission doesn’t end here. Pray protection and safety over my team during our travels. Pray for the people of the ten nations we are being sent out to. Pray and ask if you are to support me in pioneering with my team to Argentina to share Jesus to the people of the Patagonia Mountains. If you feel like the Lord is leading you to partner with this mission to Argentina, you can donate at this secure link: http://www.gofundme.com/6zeegs
If you would like to know more about this mission and how you can help, please e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org